Tuesday, February 21, 2012

"Keep me safe, O Lord...."

"1 Keep me safe, O God, for in you I take refuge. 2 I said to the LORD, "You are my Lord; apart from you I have no good thing." you have made my lot secure. 7 I will praise the LORD, who counsels me; even at night my heart instructs me. 8 I have set the LORD always before me. Because he is at my right hand, I will not be shaken. 9 Therefore my heart is glad and my tongue rejoices; my body also will rest secure, 10 11 You have made known to me the path of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand. "
16 Psalms

I could not leave off part of this passage from Psalm 16 ...I am sad, at peace, and knowing I am in God's hands. The CT/PET was not good at all. The cancer has grown and is covering over half my liver. It is spreading into other places also. I said to my oncologist today--"I guess this is my last "stand".." and he made no reply. He has always been so positive and I could read his feelings. I get two bags of blood tomorrow, because I am anemic, and start the chemo Thursday (probably an 8 hour day). I am not afraid and know I am living within God's will, as I have for nearly 8 years now on this cancer journey. Who knows what a miracle this chemo might be! I am ready for it to be! Anyway, "My heart is glad" and "my body will rest secure".


  1. Barbara Johnson-ClarkFebruary 21, 2012 at 11:09 PM

    Oh dear Sister,
    It is so understandable that you are sad and so wishing the Pet Scan could have been better. This makes my heart bleed for you. But you sound so peaceful and so at ease. And you are still ready for a cure. That's our Bev. NEVER give up! And what a miracle this new chemo has been touted to be--bring it on--let's see it do its job, because we know that it will be God's work, whatever it does.
    We love you, and we are still praying,

  2. My Precious Proverbs 31 Lady, There are no words I can say. My heart feels them but my mind has none except...You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother's womb. Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous-how well I know it.Psalm 139:13-14 When I see you I always think "Wow what a masterpiece Father!" One has to admire the struggle it takes to be human. If I have learned anything, I have learned being human is not easy. You walk so gracefully in the not knowing, 'by knowing' you are not doing this alone."Trust in the Lord with all your heart" Proverbs 3:5 Let them change the chemo schedule. "For the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go." Joshua 1:9 By your faith He has carried you this far for His purpose that is much greater than our humaness can see; He's got this too! Father, I lift your child to you, this beautiful masterpiece of a Proverbs 31 woman who has been such a inspiration and literally has changed many a life's direction. Fill her with your power and strength. Surround her with your grace and peace. May she have rest and renewal for this day. We know that in 'You Father is the source of our strength, in you we can do all things.' Phillippians 4:13. Thank you Father. Amen. Whatever challenges come your way remember you are loved by so many and by the Father himself! Thank you so much for sharing your journey the highs and lows. For 'letting your light shine before men, that they may see His good deeds and praise His name in heaven." Matthew 5:16 His light glows brightly in you. As always don't forget to laugh...Two young girls approached an older lady as she was counting out her vitamins, 'What are the pills for?" they asked. I explained, "these two are for beautiful eyes, that little one is for pearly, white teeth..." The other girl interrupted me, "Haven't been taking them long, have you?" :=) I love you. sk