Sunday, May 1, 2011

"Therefore we do not lose heart..."

"..though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary but what is unseen is eternal." II Cor.4:16-18

I have had writers block lately..just cannot think of anything to say. I have had the pain that I hope is gall stones; if not, I am "in a heap of trouble" as an old southern saying goes! My fingernails look like someone chewed them beyond the "quick" and this drives me crazy. I always enjoyed having nice nails, not beauty shop kind but just "nice". My skin is still acting like I am deficient in something and any tiny bump makes a terrible cut or bruise. As I am working in the yard and bumping into bushes or twigs, I get scratched and my arms look like I have been "dog-bit". The occasional acne rash the protocol promised has turned out to be a bunch of raw or red places on my face. This has been the WORST chemo of all six I have done! It just keeps on doing things to me, and it has been four months since I had the last injection! So I feel like I look terrible, covering up my arms alot. My hair is growing back pretty good, and I hope by June I will be able to be ME again!

In all of this, as friends ask "how are you feeling", I truthfully tell this I feel good and actually I am gaining strength. I am walking , working in the yard. My daughter said today, "can you believe you can do all this?" God is giving me good days, good times and ability to feel normal in the midst of all this. So I will not "lose heart"...

2 comments:

  1. You are beautiful both inside and out! Love you!

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  2. Barbara Johnson-ClarkMay 2, 2011 at 8:45 AM

    Ditto to Jana's comment. There is no doubt in my mind that the fingernails, the rash, the hair and any other side effect from the chemo are driving you crazy. And we are worried right along with you about the "gall stones" and praying that you have for real gall stones bumping around in there causing havoc in your belly. But as for beauty, you are one of those people God blessed so richly and the TRUEST example of when we make that statement, "She's just as beautiful on the inside as she is on the outside." You are, and your beauty shines for all who come in contact with you to brighten their day and leave a little sunshine with them as they go on their way. We love you, and by the way, our luncheon lacked only two things--Becky and you!
    Hugs!

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