I did not write yesterday, because it seems there have been bad days lately and I hate the repetition. Today was a good day. I went swimming with my family including my great grand daughter! She is nearly 7 and she will remember this. First I told her "you know I have been sick for some time?" She told me "yes", and then I told her about the medicine making me lose my hair. She was shocked that I wear a wig. So I took my wig off and she was like" "Oh my" and I told her that she is old enough to see me like that and I can trust her to understand. She said that was ok and so we went with my one inch hair and had so much fun! No one else at the pool even noticed or if they did, just thought I have really short hair.
I am still not ready to go public with my short hair. It needs to be about two inches for that. I think I realized as I was having fun in the water, that...this is why chemo is worth it! To have life and be with family makes it all worth it!
I have been seeing video of our newest and I nearly cry, seeing that precious baby whom I long to hold. Even with the bad days, life is good.
Micah 7:7, "But as for me, I watch in hope for the Lord, I wait for God my Savior; my God will hear me."
Change After 30 Years
4 weeks ago
Dearest Bev,
ReplyDeleteYou looked so pretty at church this morning (as always). Alan saw John and you leaving as he went to get the car. He wasn't with me when you and I talked. He said to me later in the car, "I saw John and Bev. Wow, she looks so good. She is such a beautiful woman." Unsolicited!!! We talked about how no matter how bad you feel, you always look gorgeous. You know I had forgotten about the hair loss and wig. I never notice! You obviously have a very good wig! I know you feel just rotten now, and the chemo hasn't had quite enough time to work the miracle we are praying for, and it's okay for you to be honest about how you feel. You DO NOT have to say "fine" when someone asks.
How fun your swimming date sounded! And yes, LIFE IS GOOD! And Bev, life is going to get BETTER. Hang in there dear sweet friend.
We love you, and we are ALL praying for you,
Barbara and Alan