Not a feel-good day...disappointment

This is probably the worst feeling day of this chemo experience. The zofran is not totally keeping the nausea down, and my back aches, my fingers are cracking open, my face is "breaking out" and I am dizzy at times. My hair is slowly getting thinner. These are prices I pay for the hopeful working of the treatments. Food tastes very strange, nothing tastes normal. I eat because I know I need to, but if this is like the other weeks, gradually, things revert to near normal, just in time for the next chemo.
Friends call and ask how I am feeling and I usually say "pretty good" or "not too bad"...hating to go into details like this and really, relating how you feel is really very boring. So this is the only place I really tell it like it is.
My husband looks at me with such sad eyes and he prays at least three times a day for God to heal me and take this cancer away (and probably other times I don't hear him). John says I am a "fighter" and that "I refuse to give up". I hope to keep this attitude. So I am ,at this stage, so totally dependent on God's mercies. I love how Zechariah prophesied in Luke 1:68---"Praise be to the Lord, the God of Israel, because He has come and redeemed His people". I need this healing, kind of like a redemption...O God.