Tuesday, February 23, 2010

My name on His hands.....

At long last, I am able to drive again!...We take so much for granted, not only our health, eyes, hearing, and all that, but just daily living and ability to do for ourselves. I went to the grocery today ALL BY MYSELF and it felt so good. I appreciate all John does for me and with me, but I sure did miss my independence for six weeks of not driving. I was able to get haircut today, having also waited six weeks for that.
So tomorrow is the second radiation, and I do not look forward to that.
In Isaiah 49, God says "See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands..." (verse 16). I need to know this promise. I feel like I am in "limbo"...wondering how much the cancer is growing in my liver, and is it spreading anywhere else? Being off chemo for three months and knowing the cancer is there is a "first" for me. Whenever I have cancer actively growing, I am on chemo, so this is a leap of faith to believe God is protecting me as I have this "vacation" from the chemo. (even though during the vacation, I had brain surgery and radiation!)
So I guess I am longing to know my Father is seeing me through this period of fear and yet having assurance He is looking at my name on His hands!

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