Back to Sunday School

I had missed four Sundays from church..I attend a ladies' Sunday school class, all ages, so very supportive, prayer warriors all! The have kept me lifted up with wonderful cards, calls, food, prayers and the knowledge that they all believe "our God is able" and that healing is within His realm. This is the difficult part. I mentioned earlier that my middle sister died of cancer seven years ago. We (and all our family, her church family, friends ) had prayed so fervently for her healing. This was not to be.I totally believe in God's timing and plans for our lives, purposes and His will. I believe this more so than before her death. I believe this in regard to my life. It is impossible to pray so hard and then OUR wants not be met to then not believe that God's will is the important will and that He sometimes says "no" to our desires. This is where we have to stand firm in our inner beliefs and KNOW that even when God says "no" to our earthly desires, He knows best for our futures. I am struggling with being who he wants me to be and not being afraid and being ready for whatever His will is in my life.
"Oh, Lord, you have searched me and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; You are familiar with all my ways. Before a word is on my tongue you know it completely, O Lord. You hem me in behind and before; you have laid your hand upon me. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain. Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence?" Psalm 139:1-7